HORTICULTURE
FLOWERY
MAUA’S MIRAA
As
the semester neared closure and students flocked the library for final touches
before the exam, Charles, my friend poked me about where I will spend my long
vacation. At first I hesitated. I said I am not one of those guys who rush home
as if they were in exile .I would nostalgically stay at Meru and see what it
has to offer. Not that I did not miss my folks back home. I did. I said I
wanted to go to Nairobi to while away vacation as a kept a finger on the pulse
of the job market.
“No, come this way we go to Maua you
experience the brisk business of khat.
Besides, It is past July and the chill has subsided.” He convinced me.
Rather than rot in the city that is
infamous for its stress and suffocation, I took my jumper and suite-case and
off we went to Maua.
As we neared the khat plantations, my ignorance blinded me. I saw mid-sized trees
with overhanging branches .Succulent twigs, they were. Some looked like ashes in the trunk, at the
edges of the branches were clusters of leaves .I did not ask Charles what those
trees were. A man would rather taste than be told it is sweet or bitter. And
so, consumed by the flames of adventure, I mischievously slipped from the house
and headed directly to a nearby plantation. I cut a branch and bit it. I felt
like vomiting. Bitter herb!
I rushed to the house and drunk a mug of
water and brushed my teeth. “You ‘eat’ with ball gum, Big G , Cocacola or tea. That way masteam
znakam” , Charles told(read: taught)me. Then his voice lowered to a whisper
and he said: Do not go plucking anyone’s green gold. People here are cut hands
for stealing miraa. I was frightened
by the merciless Merians. But later I came to love them. Contrary to the stereotypes
in the media and tribal cocoons, Merians are not ill-tempered, impatient or
murderous. No Kenyan woman is as hardworking as a Merian. They are warm and
welcoming .They serve you a mountain of food and place the pot at standby for
self service.
Miraa is planted by vegetative propagation. Branches are cut and buried
in soil to grow. They need alot of water and can wither if they are not
constantly supplied with water. However, the best is saved for the last. There
is a much deserved fun as the farmer harvests the product. These cash cows
enable the planters to erect real estates , pay school fees and save the
surplus for the future. No wonder Meru has an influx of commercial banks.
Another amazing thing is the Merians embracing
other communities. Somalis freely mix with the Merians in cultivation and
harvesting to sale of miraa. Birds of
a feather flock together. They have learn each other’s vernacular and are also
reliable consumers of own product. Talk of made in Kenya by Kenyans for
Kenyans.
If you though the horticulturalists from
Mt. Kenya are myopic, then think again. They package their miraa for both the local and international market. Often, pick-ups and bodaboda taxis transport this coveted stuff. For the purpose of
maintaining the khat’s freshness,
polythene bags wrap the moisture around the herbs. The vapour may evaporate
therefore making the twigs stale and compromise consumer quality. The” ganja” planters know this only too well
and even diversify to eco-friendly banana leaves to cover miraa from sunlight.
Perishables are delicate. They require
speedy transport and quick consumption. Next time a pick –up on Meru-Nairobi
Highway gives you a close shave count yourself lucky and thank God that you are
not six feet under .These ambulances need to get to the market fast. However,
this should not be done at the expense of flouting the traffic rules, killing
or injuring innocent Kenyans .Moderation is the key.
Matatu drivers claim that they want to relief stress and hangovers and
sink into deep addiction. They squander family income in miraas to the chagrin of their poor dependants. Students drop out
of school in the false assumption of getting a quick dime .Nothing irks the eye
more than a miraa chewer spitting
green saliva on the floor or the ground .Given the tooth decay and mouth odour
I wonder whether they brush their teeth. If no, don’t they turn off their
partners in the name of kissing?
It is debatable whether or not miraa causes impotence. One theory
contends that they produce watery and headless sperms that cannot swim and thus
unable to fertilise the ovum. Medical researchers need to dig deeper to come up
with solid evidence on this controversial issue. But one thing is sure :miraaa causes insomnia. Your eyes are kept open in the dark
night as you struggle to sleep .If you
are not a long distance truck driver or a watchman( Let me be gender sensitive
for once, A Chief Security Officer) do not touch miraa for it makes you forever alert and active even when you don’t
want to.
After a week of stay I went home. Home
sweet home. There’s no place like home.
